The Dark Side of Your Emotional Needs – Mind and Body

“The human body experiences a powerful gravitational pull in the direction of hope. That is why the patient’s hopes are the physician’s secret weapon. They are the hidden ingredients in any prescription.” – Norman Cousins

 

Your body matters, and so does your mind, because they’re the same matter. Your emotions directly affect your body, and it goes the other way too. Mental and physical health cannot be disentangled.

 

Each and every one of us has a natural current running through us called the ultradian rhythm. Every 90 to 120 minutes we shift from left-brain dominance to right-brain. The shift takes about 20 minutes, and it usually makes us feel a little entranced or day-dreamy.

 

It’s during this shift that the immune system does its upkeep, the brain incorporates new learning, and the gut digests and absorbs nutrients. It’s little wonder that when we continue to swim against the tides of this natural rhythm we start to feel broken and emotional.

 

Sure, you can refuse to listen to your physical needs for a while, override them for a bit… but do it for long enough and you’ll come to feel depleted on every level.

 

Hypnotizing someone is often a case of just letting the sails catch the breeze of this warm and wonderful natural shift in physical and mental focus.

People increasingly treat themselves as machines. We work through lunch, sleep too little, eat junk on the run, skip the gym, and prop up our flagging bodies with ‘energy drinks’.

 

But neglecting proper nutrition, sleep, rest, and exercise long term leads to psychological problems and stress-induced illness, and not just on the individual level. In unhealthy populations, collective emotions run riot. And that can lead us down some dark paths.

 

With too little exposure to natural light, poor nutrition, and scant exercise we start to feel second-rate… we become weak and sick in mind and body.

 

And what is good for the body is good for the mind. Having a terrible diet (or eating foods your body is intolerant of) can make you feel depressed and anxious. Conversely, physical exercise, even a 30 minute walk is protective against anxiety and a wonderful mood enhancer, especially when done outdoors in nature.

 

It’s a cliché to talk about ‘self-medicating’. But people do. Whether through comfort eating, smoking, alcohol, or barbiturates, or cannabis, it’s a common way to ‘switch off’, forget about the day and absorb oneself in the moment.

 

But self-medication is always accompanied by self-delusion – convincing ourselves, consciously or unconsciously, that the ‘medication’ has few side effects, or that somehow we can cheat the future.

 

Cliché it may be, but ‘self-medication’ is a fine analogy. Indeed, it’s the side effects that are the problem. Side effects that can make it harder for people to meet their actual physical and emotional needs.

 

When we seek in the long term to provide ourselves with energy through coffee instead of rest, to distract ourselves from problems through the oblivion of drugs, or to resort to any form of self-harm rather than actually working to solve our problems, then the attempted ‘solution’ becomes the enemy – not the comforting or encouraging ‘friend’ it might masquerade as.

 

Listen and you will hear…

 

We all need to work at being attuned to our bodies. If we don’t, we can lose the capacity to interpret the signals from our bodies. We need to listen to our bodies – always. What is it you actually need?

From the desk of Mark Tyrrell http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/?6660

 

 

 

When to Stop Being a Patient and Escape the Victim Cage!

Louise had really been through some serious life trials – a history of disordered eating, multiple psychiatric hospitalizations, 5 psychotropic’s for 15 years, and an extremely challenging taper process. We had resolved any diagnostic trace of Grave’s Disease, moved her through a beautiful pregnancy, and homebirth, breastfeeding, and yet, it was hard for her to feel – truly feel – the magnitude of healing that had taken place. To embrace what it means to no longer be a patient – not an endocrine patient, not a psychiatric patient, not an obstetrical patient… to simply be herself.

 

 

Surrendering the status of patient

One would think that being released from the patient role would feel like getting out of jail. But what if when the jail cell is open, you don’t want to leave? In psychology, this is called learned helplessness: a kind of beating down of any sense of personal power that creates incapacity to change one’s circumstances.

 

This learned helplessness is what the conventional medical system can do to an unsuspecting consumer. It can give you a label – one that actually feels good to receive because it seemingly validates your felt experience of suffering and struggle – and then you become that label. I suffer from general anxiety disorder, I have ADD, ADHD, I’m bipolar, I am on the Asperger’s Spectrum, I am a diabetic, etc.

 

 

And you don’t know who you are without this label, without the routine of appointments and prescriptions, without the social currency of your health complaints, and without worrying about your wellbeing. Sometimes, this state of being just feels too familiar to imagine moving beyond… like an itchy wool sweater that you’ve gotten used to and would rather not brave the cold without.

 

What does it mean to no longer be sick?

What it means is that suffering has taken on personal meaning. Almost the moment that it does, it paradoxically ceases to be suffering. Symptoms stop being a problem and start being an opportunity to learn more about this wondrous vessel your consciousness inhabits… Your Body!

 

But is it really your body? Did you make it? As Michael Singer would say, “Go ahead – make an eyeball…I’m waiting!” Or as Alan Watts would say, “You don’t have to think about how to work your thyroid gland, it just happens.” And you are there simply to be with this happening. .. to support it and allow for it?

 

It is your body’s process; the depth, timing, and mystery of it is not for you to command.

And like a child having a tantrum, it’s only when you make a practice of really seeing them, hearing them, and honouring them that the tantrums stop and the harmonious dance of mother-child begins. Similarly, it’s only when you stop fighting, domineering, and dictating the conditional terms of acceptance to your body – when you finally stop and you make a truce – then the deep healing begins.

 

Is your inner control freak at the wheel?

Having been on both the patient and the clinician end, I now find that a lot of the testing, supplementation, and general high-level management of integrative and functional medicine can keep patients stuck in the fighting and commanding posture, lording over their body machine.

 

How about a new probiotic for the less-than-perfect poops, or more pau d’arco to kill the yeast, or perhaps extra l-theanine for the possibility that I might not fall immediately asleep tonight. Do your thoughts ever sound like that? Of course, there is nothing inherently wrong with supplements or natural approaches – the point is that the intentionality and the mindset matter. Are you looking to fight a symptom or support the response that it represents?

 

Stopping this fight entails relinquishing the need to micromanage your body’s expressions, getting to a point where you say – wow, I hear you Body…I’m finally listening. I promise to honour you every day and to trust that you know exactly what you’re doing.

 

This receptive energetic posture is how you create the conditions for healing. This is how your Body shows you, in the present, that there is something that has yet to be resolved. And only when we listen with curiosity will we be intuitively led to exactly what that is – from a toxic exposure to a buried traumatic memory. No fancy testing required.

 

First things first – the reunion with the Body

Saying no and setting boundaries is hard. In a people-pleasing social fabric, we are very uncomfortable with the possibility that someone might not like us if we do. But if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that boundaries set us free.

 

That lines create the empty spaces that we release into. So, before letting go of the Body steering wheel, before understanding that it’s not really your Body to manage, and before bowing to it every day – you have to reunite with this Body. You have to learn what it is to care for your Body even when your mind is trying to tell you that you don’t have time, that it’s not necessary, and that self-care is a precious fad.

 

I believe in fierce grace.

And the fierce part comes first, in the form of commitment to a higher level of care – Body, mind and spirit – than most of us are comfortable with. Through this ritual – in the case of my patients and Vital Mind Reset participants, a month-long ritual – you send your body a very different signal… a signal that informs a truce. You say, I will prioritize caring for you – nourishing, cleansing, and generally honouring you. And this gesture – even if you don’t even feel it authentically from the start – incites a response.

 

 

The Body responds with the dissolution of symptoms and early indications that it is, in fact, listening, and that a conversation has begun. But there is a point at which you understand the cosmic hierarchy, and then you bow down to its wisdom and give your Body permission to do its thing, its way. And then your Body shows you where the journey is taking you. A clear Body feels intuitively what is right and what is wrong. And as long as the mind is receptive and not reactive, then there are no longer any mental decisions to make. It all becomes a happening.

 

The tyranny of perfect health and happiness

The goal cannot and should not be perfect health and happiness. Why not? Because these goals imply that the process of Body truce and honour is simply a means to an outcome that is ever receding into the future. But we are here, right now, having a real embodied experience of this lifetime. It is rich with strangeness and wonder, and if you are courageous enough, it will be peppered with mystical opportunities to grow and to look deeper into the hurt places that need attention, love, and care…and you won’t call them problem symptoms any longer. You’ll call them invitations to finally, truly be yourself.

From the Desk of Mark Tyrrell http://www.hypnosisdownloads.com/?6660